Monday, July 11, 2005

What sexy means

Miss Lima is a sexy thing for sure. It's an official fact that most males will enthusiastically corroborate while most females might perhaps grudgingly admit (but not without following up, I suspect, with a comment about her IQ and that sort of stuff!).

(For the record and for my own safety, I just want to emphasize that I wholeheartedly support anything that fosters the blossoming of women's beauty in all its forms and that I vigorously condemn anything that exploits female beauty for selfish male ends without sensitive and considerate reciprocation).

The fact remains that sexy is sexy, and no matter how people define it, they know it when they see it.

But what does "sexy" mean, exactly, beyond a geometric and harmonious proportionality or a certain set of conventionally agreed upon standards?

Are you sexy? Am I sexy? And, in the context of this blogzine, how does being sexy help one's career?

For one thing, unless you plan to go to the next job interview dressed like Miss Lima, it might be better to clearly define what we mean by "sexy". I'm 36 years old, and after 3 decades of carefully studying women, I am pleased to offer a liberating yet intellectually productive definition. Sexy means:

"obviously having what they desperately want."

In other words, "sexy" is the result of careful seductive research and design. By research and design, I mean the activities conducted in order to find out what they desperately want and be able to promise and deliver just that.

(As an aside, I wish to say I agree with Dr. Leonard Schlain ( when he says that women use dating to evaluate men, based on what they reveal -- consciously or unwittingly -- during a conversation. But I suspect that women trained in the art of seduction also use conversation to reverse engineer the male brain under study, so as to design highly effective seductive ploys and moves that the "poor" male in question cannot possibly resist.)

Well, let's get back to planet Earth. Let's take your LinkedIn profile as an example. How can you make sure that all readers (some of whom might perhaps be recruiters or employers) will immediately understand that you obviously got what they want? In other words, how can you make sure that whatever information you reveal will either immediately grab their attention or, better yet, make them want to table a proposal?

In future postings, we'll explore various ways to do just that. But for now, it's important to notice that unless you are sexy, no one will be willing to sit down and negotiate seriously with you.